Toy Rubber Fish I Have A Rubber Bathtub Toy Fish Stuck Up My Butt PLEASE HELP!?

I have a rubber bathtub toy fish stuck up my butt PLEASE HELP!? - toy rubber fish

Its about 1 / 2 in width and height, also comments on the way? Please hurry, I will not tell anyone about it and I can not take the hand of all laxidives and I tryed with your fingers and just when even farther away. Now I eat a lot, it can then hopefully shit. and please do not laugh at me or call me gay, in the freaking scared!